Szilvia Szabó
Mr. Ippolito
AP Biology
February 27th, 2018
“New DNA Tool Predicts Height, Shows Promise for Serious Illness Assessment.” ScienceDaily, ScienceDaily, 4 Oct. 2018, www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2018/10/181004143856.htm.
For centuries, humans have been observing and learning about their surroundings. We have come so far and grown so much in fields of science and medicine. Nowadays, it is becoming more and more of a reality to be able to predict whether someone will contract a disease and how to prevent that. Michigan State University has created a DNA tool that can predict “height, bone density and even the level of education a person might achieve, purely based on one's genome”. This tool can predict whether someone has the potential to contract a serious disease, such as cancer and heart disease. Michigan State University has been working on this tool for a while and continues to work on its algorithms to strive for perfection.
Advancements in medicine like these are very significant and important for human society as a whole. If we can predict accurately whether or not someone will get cancer or any other sort of disease, we can save so many lives by seeing this disease early and making sure it does not progress into anything life threatening. Cancer is a disease that affects millions of people and all of the advancements we make in order to prevent this disease can help to save and drastically improve the quality of life for millions.
I liked how the author stayed pretty objective throughout the entire piece, but I feel like the author could have presented more background information on the topic, perhaps about what other sorts of inventions are out there that are similar to the one the author describes. Also, I really liked how the author used language that was really simple and to the point, making it easy for the reader to follow without getting caught up in complicated medical and science terms. However, I think it would have been better if the author threw in some more specifics about this new creation and give some more statistics and facts about it.
Charlotte Cagliostro
ReplyDeleteIppolito
AP Bio C Even / Current Event #18
3/8/19
Michigan State University “New DNA Tool Predicts Height, Shows Promise for Serious Illness Assessment.” ScienceDaily, ScienceDaily, 4 Oct. 2018, www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2018/10/181004143856.htm.
I enjoyed reading Szilvia’s review of the ScienceDaily article: “New DNA Tool Predicts Height, Shows Promise for Serious Illness Assessment.” There were three parts of her piece that I particularly enjoyed. First, I liked her writing style. Szilvia was able to write in an informative manner while still maintaining my interest. Second, I enjoyed her first paragraph. She did a great job summarizing the original article and presenting the relevant information to the reader. It was a good decision to include a quote from the article to further legitimize her writing. Lastly, I enjoyed Szilvia’s critique. She pointed out both the positive and negative features of the piece, providing an objective analysis.
Although Szilvia wrote a good review, I think she could improve it in three different ways. First, I think she should add statistics to her piece. Overall, I felt like there was a lack of scientific data. If she were to add some more information and calculations, she would create a far more accurate narrative. Second, I believe that she should further elaborate on her ideas in her second paragraph. Her connection to the real-world seemed rather rushed; I feel like she could have expanded on her thoughts to create a better connection with the reader. Lastly, I think she should adopt a far more formal tone. Especially in her first paragraph, she wrote in a far too casual manner.
One thing I learned from reading Szilvia’s work is that Michigan State University has been creating a tool that processes DNA, calculating one’s bone density, height, and highest level of education obtainable. I find it incredibly interesting how these scientists are building upon new advancements in genome research.
Anabel Maldonado
ReplyDeleteIppolito C Even
Current Event #18
March 7th, 2019
“New DNA Tool Predicts Height, Shows Promise for Serious Illness Assessment.” ScienceDaily, ScienceDaily, 4 Oct. 2018, www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2018/10/181004143856.htm.
I really enjoyed reading Szilvia review! I think she was very successful when explaining the impact this discovery has on our society. She clearly states that this tool will help a particular audience who is affected by cancer. Unlike most, she clearly explains why this discovery is so important by answering questions such as: Who does this impact? How? Why is it important? Another thing she succeeded with was illustrating the significance of cancer which helps her audience fully understand the impact and importance this discovery has on us. She states, “Cancer is a disease that affects millions of people and all of the advancements we make in order to prevent this disease can help to save and drastically improve the quality of life for millions.” Lastly, I really enjoyed reading Szilvia’s critique on the author and article. I completely agreed with Szilvia! Szilvia and I both thought that “it would have been better if the author threw in some more specifics about this new creation and give some more statistics and facts about it.”
Although her review was very well-written, there is room for improvement. I think that Szilvia should have included more information about the DNA tool. Although it is important to write about the impact it has on society, I wish it was explained more in depth. She wrote one sentence that explained the purpose of this DNA tool: “This tool can predict whether someone has the potential to contract a serious disease, such as cancer and heart disease.” I think if she did outside research and included more information about the tool, this problem would be fixed. In addition, I think that she should have included opinions from experts, statistics and more to “spice up” her review. The tone would be more intriguing if she included quotes from the article or performed outside research. If she corrected these two problems, this review would be flawless
I chose to comment on Szilvia’s review because new discoveries about cancer are very intriguing. Cancer affects millions of people in the United States and the idea that a tool can help save these millions of lives would be life-changing for our society. After I finished reading this review I was shocked by the idea of a tool helping decrease cancer in our world. This left me with hope that this medical problem could possibly have a solution.